MIMIT Evening

Presenting and I have issues – FACT! Everyone who knows me knows that I really dislike presenting. On the whole, I would say that I am a pretty well composed person. However give me something to present and I turn into a horrible nervous mess. The build up to it is the worst thing; an awful knot appears in the pit of your stomach and won’t shift until the presentation is over and done with. It’s one of the reasons why I can’t eat or drink on the day. I also have a problem with the order of presenting –I don’t like going first as everyone is alert, paying attention thus you run the risk of being shot down with many questions, some of which you may not be able to answer – HORROR! Also going last is bad for me as I feel that I might die from my nerves and overdose of adrenaline for such a sustained period of time. Therefore the middle it is then, I like the middle and the middle is good for me, lol.

Anyway why on earth am I telling you about this? Well because I can and you still chose to read it! – Joking. Back in November I was contacted by my old university (Manchester) about presenting my MSc work one evening at a medical symposium at the university. I know what you’re thinking… If I hate presentations so much, then I should have said no. But here’s how I see it, as I progress through my career (iA), I’m going to have to present my work more often whether I like it or not therefore making this medical symposium a good opportunity to practise. Secondly if I totally messed it up not to worry as I probably won’t see them again and thirdly the email stated that Professor Oldham had suggested that mine was one of the better projects. I know, I know, I am so vain and self centred but what can I say, it is nice to be appreciated :) So I said yes thinking that one of the others i.e. Chris, Dom or Eileen, would also be presenting. I discovered in January that they weren’t and I felt it would be rude and totally unprofessional of me to back out at such short notice. I mean the medical school have been really good to me and very supportive and I feel like I owe them something in return. At the back of my mind I was still contemplating feigning some sort of sickness if I felt I couldn’t go through with it on the day. What?! It’s always good to have a backup plan.

I arranged to meet my supervisor, Maureen, for lunch and she looked through my presentation slides and gave me some feedback... because she is just so lovely and helpful. She already knew I was presenting due to all the posters put up and emails sent out (eek!) and had an idea of how nervous I get. The two copies of my thesis were now fully marked; one copy was safely deposited in the library for future reference and the other was to be sent to the main supervisor. Seen as the university internal mail takes a while, I thought I would personally collect and deliver Maureen’s copy, which she asked me to sign. I’d say it was an odd but funny moment! Maureen wished me the best of luck and over the weekend I practised with mum, Bilal and even Saba who looked quite bored, the poor thing! Eventually the day arrived…

Date: Monday 25th January 2010, 1530 till 1830. (My 15 min slot was at 5.40pm – err the middle is good?)

Venue: Manchester Interdisciplinary Biocentre, Princess Street.

I got there in plenty of time (one less thing to worry about), but unfortunately Zareen couldn’t stay long and left a gift for me with Maureen which was really sweet of her. We entered the lecture theatre and sensing that my nerves beginning to take hold, I tried to keep a lid on them by concentrating on the other presentations, which didn’t really help!... and then by reading through my notes, which may have made it worse. As I was sat at the back, a lot of people snuck in and out of the theatre during the evening but I didn’t really pay any attention until Dr Ardy Bayat sat down next to me. Dr Bayat whose project I had rejected in favour of Maureen’s. Dr Bayat who said that clinical projects can be very misleading and problematic. Of all the people to meet before a major presentation, well it just had to be Dr Bayat didn’t it? Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Maureen glance in my direction and I turned and smiled at Dr Bayat… and then went back to looking at my notes. After a small break, it was my turn to present and Prof Oldham whispered that I only had 10 minutes to present as they were running late. Grr! I had taken the effort to time my presentation perfectly and now I would have to squish it all into 10 minutes.

Thankfully the presentation went well, I spoke clearly, only stumbled on my words once, even cracked a joke (yea me!), answered all questions and made it back to my seat without falling over! Yes! For the first time in the evening I could relax and I had such a buzz from completing the presentation. Prizes were handed out for the best projects and presentations etc. Assuming that all the prize giving was over now, I started to get ready to leave when Professor Oldham announced that there was still one special award left that the recipient didn’t know about it and talked a bit about the intended recipient. As I was tired, I sort of zoned out and didn’t realise that Professor Oldham had announced my name at the end. As it didn’t register at first, Maureen had to nudge me and whisper ‘It’s you, Saima’.

A dazed me got up and made my way to the front. From what I gather I received the best student award for achieving the highest marks in my year for which I received a certificate and the best student project for which I received a cash prize. During all that, I do remember having my picture taken and praying it turned out ok and also fretting that I had taken my suit jacket off and forget to put it back on as I made my way to the front. What can I say, it’s the little things that get to me :P I was still feeling a little dazed as I was congratulated by the senior medics during the MIMIT ‘meet and greet’ in the atrium afterwards. Feeling a little drained (tired/hungry after a long day) I didn’t stick around too long and offered to take Maureen to the train station as it was getting quite late. I smiled and thanked everyone and made my way to the exit, which took a while as I kept getting stopped every few steps. I was pleasantly surprised to find that my course administrator, the lovely Sue Cooper had especially come to the MIMIT evening to see me after seeing my name on the posters. I can’t explain how nice it is to have your work appreciated by so many people and after the initial embarrassment, I felt quite proud of the recognition from the university and senior medics.

Maureen had missed her train so I offered to drive her home and to be honest it was nice to have the company and just discuss the evening’s events. Maureen told me how proud she was of me and how I really deserved it after working so hard at university and at the hospital with all the patients. Upon arriving home, I shared the news with mum and auntie Naseem who were both really pleased and proud. So the lesson learnt – conquering my nerves was totally worth it!!!

Update:

Woo! I’m on the MIMIT website! Damn, I knew I should have put my jacket back on. Also looking at the picture, I’ve just realised that the silk black tie thing that was supposed to be tied around the waist of my purple shirt, must have come undone after my presentation at some point during the evening. Looking through my wardrobe I still can’t find it! Losing clothing at a conference... what am I? 5 years old?