Cool or not cool???

Ok I’m not entirely sure if this is a cool thing or not, but I’m gonna share it with you guys anyway...

I’m sat watching a movie in the lounge. Dad is at work and Bilal’s away at camp for the week so it’s just my mum and I. The conversation (a mix of English and urdu, which I’ve translated into English for you, lol) is as follows...

Mum: “Hmmm... I don’t know what you see in him, I really don’t, hai” *shakes head*
Me: *way too engrossed in the movie*... “uh huh”
Mum: “No really. I mean is he the type of boy you would bring home to meet your Dad and I?”
Me: *Really important scene in the movie coming up*... “uh huh”

A few minutes pass...

Me: “Wait, what did you say?”
Mum: “Is he the type you would bring home?”
Me: “What? Who?” *feeling rather perplexed now*
Mum: “Him!”” *she points to the screen*
Me: *looking at the screen* “Who? Keanu Reeves?” *feeling a bit bewildered*
Mum: “I know you like him. You watch his movies all the time...” *I’m biting my lip at this point to stop myself from laughing* “I’m not saying he’s bad looking, but if he’s your ‘type’ well...you know” – *she actually did use air quotes at this point and I totally know what she’s getting at*
Me: *I can’t help but burst out laughing* “Mum, I love you, I really do!” *I hug her and she ends up laughing as well*
Mum: “Don’t bring him home just yet. God knows what your dad will say” *she laughs*

I can’t fully explain what she means in this post (for fear of it sounding at bit impolite) but those of you that know me or my family will totally get it. Putting that aside, she then went to list guys that she thinks I had/have crushes on. Honestly I have to say, it was a bit of a weird moment for me and a few things that struck me were;
a) How the hell did my mum figure out I have a crush on Keanu Reeves?*
b) Mum thought Keanu looked like a boy when actually he could actually pass for her younger brother, lol.
c) My mum thinks I have a type? Wait. No bigger than that... My mum knows my type?!
d) My mum remembers the names of guys I may have liked when I was younger.
e) Never at any point in this conversation did my mum flip out, lecture me or seem disappointed at any point. How cool is she?**

* Ok so maybe anyone could figure that out as it hasn’t exactly been a well kept secret due to certain family members. They know who they are.
** I couldn’t actually tell her point D at that time as my jaw had hit the floor at the beginning of the conversation and was firmly STILL in the same place.

So there you go people; an insight into the wonderful relationship that I have with my mother (mA) :)

I do wonder though, would other girls out there be freaked out if your mum ever brought up this topic of conversation? I can imagine that the younger girls may be horrified at the thought but perhaps as you grow older it seems more acceptable maybe? FYI, in asian households it hardly ever happens and if it does well you end up looking a bit shocked like I was, lol.

My mum told me that as a little girl, if I ever liked anyone I would totally do anything for them and she said it was a very cute thing to watch. I definitely don’t remember anything of the sort but apparently it happened quite a bit during my childhood in Halifax and some summer holidays in Pakistan. Ah well it is funny hearing things from a different perspective though.

Ok, here’s a question for you – who was your first ever crush? You guys have read mine, so it is only fair that I know yours! Feel free to post under anonymous if you like if it’s too shameful to admit to personally ;)

A second chance

As it was my birthday, I was recently sat socialising with a group of good friends. We were chatting away as usual, discussing various topics and every so often some would ask a question or two and we'd go round the group and give our responses. One the girls came up with a question that really stuck in my mind. She asked;

“In your life up to now, think of all the things you’ve done, places you’ve been and people you’ve come across. Now if you could go back in time and change something, anything at all, what would it be, why and how would you go about changing the final outcome?”

To be honest, we didn't expect her to come up with such a thought provoking question, lol :P A simple and straightforward question and soon the group became silent for a moment for two, as we gave the question some serious thought. So round we went the circle of friends, giving our responses and I thought about all those moments in my life. The decisions and mistakes I had made; family matters, friends I had made, my chosen career path, people I met, so many things I had done, so many things to think about. Thinking about it, I could have listed a number of things at that moment that I would have loved to do differently if I had the chance. It eventually got to my turn and I remember saying something about Aishi as that was what occupied my mind lately. I think everyone expected that response from me and were understanding about my reply. You see over the years it’s this group of friends, as well as my family, that have kept me going and I’ve shared quite a large chunk of my life with them. Therefore I found it easy to give them such an answer and not have to worry about what they think as I don’t have a problem being myself around these guys :)

But the question stuck in my mind and I thought about it some more over the next few days. It made me go off on a tangent and wonder about the bigger questions... do the little choices in life affect the final outcome or will you still arrive at that point in life regardless of the decisions you make? On the surface of it all, there are many things I would like to change... one the major things was to have Aisha in my life once more. But I realise that wasn’t something that was really in my control to begin with, it’s more Allah’s doing than mine. I was once told by someone, not much older than me actually, that Allah only puts you through what he thinks you can handle. Basically the crap that you have to deal with is your fair share and while it may look like everyone around you seems to have it much easier than you, it’s just not true.

The way I see it is that the good, the bad whatever has happened over the years has all contributed to shaping me into the person I am today. There have been some tough choices but hopefully some valuable lessons as well which have helped me to mature (I hope). I’m fairly happy with the choices I’ve made, a few regrets but I guess it’s just human nature to want more. I’m not saying I’m perfect as I don’t believe anyone is, but all that I have said and done, all that has happened, happened for a reason. So there you have it; my outlook on the universe – those choices however big or small have all helped to bring me to point in my life where I stand today in this world.

And so to conclude, back to the original question that started this thought process; what would I change? After thinking long and hard about it, I came to an answer that even I was surprised by. My answer, as much as it pains me to say it, would be nothing. But I wonder... do others think the same as me? The people that I think I know so well, do they see their lives as perfect or have felt that everything up to this point has been completely wrong for them. Perhaps they are in between those two extremes. What about you; where do you stand?

Artificial sweeteners

Wow. Who knew that my dad’s unfounded claims about sweeteners would eventually be reinforced with actual evidence? I know I shouldn’t be surprised, but I can’t help it, lol.

Artificial sweeteners are often used by people who are concerned about calories and are looking for alternatives to sugar. My father after being diagnosed a diabetic, was advised to cut down on a lot of sweet things; something which his diet did not lack. His major obstacle became his tea drinking as my dad couldn’t drink his tea without an extraordinary amount of sugar in it. Yet at the same time he wasn’t willing to cut down on the number of cups he was drinking and so we were stuck in a bit of a quandary.

The alternative that was suggested to my father was to use artificial sweeteners. I think he took them for a whole two weeks before he declared in a sad voice that it just wasn’t the same and would have sugar again even if it was going to be ½ a teaspoon.

Even though I am not a tea or coffee drinker, logic would suggest that ½ a teaspoon of sugar in a full mug of tea even after being equally dispersed by stirring, would NOT allow the taste of sugar to be detected. Therefore by this logic, surely ½ a teaspoon or sugar or none at all – how would you know the difference? Clearly it matters to my father, lol.

Anyhow back to the point I was making – this study, please click on the link to read more.

And for more information on the university study, please click here.

A study on artificial sweeteners suggests that they may actually cause weight gain, which obviously is bad news for those calorie counters.

In an animal study, the behaviour of rats was studied with regards to eating habits. The rats were split into two groups; one group consumed yoghurts sweetened with sugar whilst the group consumed yoghurt sweetened with an artificial sweetener called saccharin. The rats were then provide with an unlimited supply of food in order to prevent any bias in the study i.e. the rats entering starvation mode due to limited food therefore altering the body’s metabolism and appetite regulation.

The study results indicated that saccharin group gained more weight and ate more calories compared to their counterparts that were fed the sugar sweetened yoghurt. Furthermore after a certain period of time, the saccharin groups didn’t attempt to regulate their weight thus proving that sweeteners have a longer lasting effect than sugar.

The group hypothesis that when an individual experiences a sweet taste, the body’s metabolism increases in anticipation that a sweet high calorie meal was on its way. With a sweetener, the anticipated food does not arrive thus confusing the body and so problems with appetite regulation can occur. Interesting, isn’t it?

Yet on the other hand there are still studies out there that show sweeteners can help lower weight in a calorie controlled diet. So, what should you believe? Personally I’d say that eating healthily and naturally from start is a much better option and it prevents other surplus/ side issues from occurring. I class a healthy diet as a diet that does include fat and sugar but in moderate amounts, plus the avoidance of artificial sweeteners and preservatives.